There’s a revolution building. It is soldiered by men who were sexually abused as boys. These men will change the world. They are claiming their manhood, expressing emotional pain and raising their voices against pedophiles.
These men are teaching boys that silence and shame are not the only answers to sexual grooming and blackmail.
As with all revolutions, this one is will become more ugly before life gets better. We’re seeing the beginning of it now with fresh reports daily that rock the foundations of our childcare, education and justice systems.
Religious leaders are being brought to their knees and paying a heavy price for their superior attitude toward damaged, innocent children. Abusers who hunt boys for sport will not be allowed to hide their crimes in locker rooms.
Incestuous family secrets are leaking. Moms are now refusing to cover up or clean up the mess.
We believe the boys, including those who were harmed decades ago.
This change is the force that will also stop the victimization of girls. Go for it guys! Speak up!
Most childhood secrets about sexual abuse are a story told from a place of darkness. Men, you are not alone. There is a brighter future ahead. Help is available 24/7. Be a part of the revolution.
Take some inspiration from Raymond Tucker who spoke through this short poem: (Youtube version)
Last night I had a dream
Of a long forgotten place,
As it started coming back to me
Sadness filled my face;
I saw a little boy
Who did not understand,
What was being done to him
At his father’s hand;
With nowhere else to run
And no place to hide,
He built himself a box
Deep inside his mind;
Inside the box he went
Where no one else could see,
And there he stayed content in peace
As the world around him changed
And everybody grew,
He remained inside the box
And no one ever knew;
I walked up to the box
To take a look inside,
And tell the little boy
There was no need to hide;
Tears are running down my face now
I could not bear to see,
For when I looked inside the box
All I saw was me.
Raymond climbed out of his box and dedicated his life to helping other men who have suffered from CSA. You can read more of his poems and essays in Mind Guards the Gate.
Vagilantes has found that most men, like Raymond, who have admitted their abuse are willing to talk with other men who are searching for help. There are a growing number of organizations that serve male victims/survivors:
1in6 is an organization that takes its name from research that indicates one in six boys will be sexually abused by the time they are 18. They emphasize privacy and self-pacing for the process of dealing with CSA trauma. Parents, family members and loved ones will also find help from this progressive resource.
Men Thriving is an informal online peer-support option. Just guys talking with guys – no resources for spouses, friends or family.
Male Survivor offers a wide range of programs, including an international directory of support.
Oprah Winfrey helped men take a giant step forward with one of her TV programs where 200 men stood together to reveal they were molested.
We believe these men who were damaged as boys have a lot to teach us. We believe they have started a revolution to raise the standard of living for every child. Carry on, men.
When a man talks big, he needs to be able to fill the shoes he claims are his size. Thaddeus Matthews advertises that he is “The Baddest Man on the Radio!” He loves to attract controversy, but he isn’t carrying the load he created when he posted child porn during a radio show.
Matthews was indicted this week on three felony counts for posting an image of a girl under five years of age having sex with a man. The photo received intended attention for the sensationalist radio talk show host. Now, he faces a max of 30 years behind bars.
‘No fair,’ Matthews claims. Although he admits posting the image, he says he wasn’t the only one. His they-are-picking-on-me defense doesn’t cause Vagilantes to offer sympathy for his predicament.
He insists that he posted the image in an attempt to identify the man and to locate the child. This could have been done by cropping the photo to include only the man’s face.
Vagilantes has not seen the photo, so we can’t give detailed criticism about how it was presented. But, the topic at hand is not about the posting, it’s about how Matthews has responded to his arrest.
He’s let his ego trump his position of strength. It’s great that this shock-jock has a mic. It’s power in his hands. Unfortunately, he’s using his platform to wallow in self-pity and point to political conspirators.
Talk bigger, Thaddeus. It’s been a terrible week for you, and your legal process will be a nightmare, but you can turn this situation around.
The indictment is not about your position on a sales tax increase. It’s about the exploitation of kids for the sexual pleasure of adults. It’s about you knowingly using this child’s abuse to titillate your fans. It’s about being a bigger man. Make a bigger apology.
Back off of your poor-me ploy and use this opportunity to excite your listeners on the topic of pedophiles. You claim to be the baddest man… There are child abusing men who are truly bad. Use your voice to help stop them. People are listening.
Online social relationships can be tricky. Connecting thru keyboards might lead to learning more than you really want to know. Or, it may take you exactly where you intend to go.
Shannon Leigh Moy learned his Facebook friend was not as friendly as he expected. Moy posted depraved images of kiddie porn and hoped to receive such titillating gifts in return.
Moy’s online buddy was deeply disturbed by photos of a naked man having sex with a girl who appeared to be about seven years old. He shot back a quick ‘You’re a sick fuck’ message and went directly to the police – good move. His post and a subsequent search warrant took Moy offline… probably not for long enough.
Who needs friends? Omegle has based their business model on chatting with strangers. Page one, they have a no-no message for perverts with an 18+ only option. (Yeah, like kids will never use that button.)
Kristopher K. Sims, 30, was busted while pretending to be 14. Among his crimes was posting images of a man having sex with a girl younger than four. Omegle turned him in. Omegle and other online chatmills like Tinychat and Chatroulette didn’t plan to go into the pedophile-monitoring business. Guess it comes with the trade – until they find a way to stop it.
Social gaming also has it’s share of losers. Xbox Live was an open window to a 10-year old boy for Scott Anthony Estes. The boy didn’t like the games proposed by his new playmate, and he told his dad about the slimy messages. Dad did the right thing. Officials found Estes had other kids on the hook. The young boys had sent nude photos to the prev who prefers 3-8 year olds. Estes posted images of himself having sex with children. It’s time to pull the plug on him.
In the last few days, Microsoft has cracked down on Xbox cursing. We hope to see more news of f’n Xbox cracking down on soliciting kids for sex.
Child sexual abusers rely on a network of conspirators to feed their obsessions. Beyond common locker-room talk, pedophiles love to share their trophies of kids caught in a net that should be a safe place to play.
Google is building safeguards against people like Raul Gonzales who uploaded over 3,000 images of CSA, including one of his own victims, a nine-year old.
There’s nothing unusual about Gonzales. He’s just one of those boys who like to brag. He’s another example of why Google and Microsoft have stepped up their global CSA monitoring programs.
Changes are happening. We are stopping more pedophiles… at least, we are arresting more of them. It’s not the final answer to CSA, but we’ll take it and move forward.
Be more socially connected:
1. Rise up when you see possible or certain child sexual abuse.
2. Share this post with your online friends.
3. Give yourself a warm hug from Vagilantes. Wishing you a wonderful holiday season. Make only good memories.
Girls are warned early that boys like to brag about their sexual experience, even when it is nonexistent. Pedophiles also practice this common exercise of ego boosting.
Bragging serves a special purpose for child molesters. It helps to identify other members of their tribe, and maybe connect them with a new source of kiddie porn or live kids. It’s a grooming tool used with adults who might have access to whatever thrills the seeker wants.
Recently, “Joe” contacted Vagilantes and told us about his coworker, at a kids after-school program, who often brags about how much little girls love him and how sexy they can be. The coworker is grooming Joe. He’s fishing for a response to learn if Joe might like to play the same sick games he does. (Joe was advised to report the conversations to the police, and to his employer. Knowing the employer might not take the report seriously, Vagilantes recommended reporting to more than one place to help close the cracks that pedophiles slip through.)
Braggarts aren’t the brightest bulbs. They can fail to read how other people are receiving their nasty tales. Big mistake.
Ryan Firoved was also grooming when he told his girlfriend that he had sex with a 12-year old girl. His girlfriend told the police.
Firoved, a convicted child rapist and married father, continued to brag about his history of sex with other young girls. He pushed his girlfriend to allow him access to her nine year old daughter. When Firoved arrived at a motel expecting to have sex with the girl, police were waiting on the other side of the door. He’s now sentenced to 10 more years in prison.
If Firoved continues to brag while he’s in the big house, he may meet the same fate as Mitchell Harrison. The 23-year old repeated child sex offender was disemboweled this month in his cell at Frankland Prison – the same prison where child-killer Ian Huntley had his throat slashed last year. Harrison’s gruesome death came at the hands of two fellow inmates who used razor blades melted into toothbrush handles. His killers said that he bragged too much about raping girls.
On the other side of the coin, journalist Alyana Cronk and her brother Israel are two people on a mission to stop child sexual abuse. They rode a motorcycle 2,200 miles on a month-long fund-raising trip. All donations were given to the organization Darkness to Light. A film crew went along on the journey and created another way to spread their message to help stop pedophiles. The film premiered and the siblings were honored last week the annual D2L Gala.
Now, that’s something to brag about!
Yes, paint can save a child from sex-trafficking.
Maybe “fling” is too strong of a word, because if you watch the Daily Camera video you will see that some of the painters are using very fine-tipped brushes and taking great care with each stroke.
The painters are part of a 48-hour marathon to paint three large canvases. Each finished painting will be given to the highest contributor on the way to a goal of $25,000. (They’re over halfway to the goal and still need a bit of help. It’s never bad to surpass a goal, so your contribution is welcome anytime.)
The pledges will fund a trip to Cambodia for 10 students in the Naropa University art therapy program. This service learning trip was organized by Professor Sue Wallingford. She plans for the students to work with the Cambodian Women’s Crisis Center which supports women and children rescued from the sex trade.
CWCC projects include a focus on prevention with education programs for girls, including sex-ed and how to be safe when they are away from home. Women can receive work-training and startup business loans. The organization, funded by donations, offers a variety of programs, including anger management interventions for men – to stop domestic violence.
Asia is a hotspot for sex-tourists. The Internet has spawned a lucrative new industry of international kiddie porn. Girls and boys are both at risk. Efforts to protect children from such exploitation are complicated by the Cambodian culture which has one of the lowest levels of gender equality in Asia according to the 2012 Gender Equity Index. Significant changes are needed to empower women and raise standards in that country.
The Cambodian Women’s Crisis Center believes that people make better choices when they have better options. Ten dedicated student workers from the U.S. endorse that mission, and they want to help. They’ll leave soon for Cambodia with a spirit of colorful creativity, and an intention to serve in any way they can.
They can do a lot. We can do a little bit to help them on their way.
Meet Sweetie, the popular online 10-year-old girl who will make your dreams come true. She’s also great at introducing men to their biggest nightmare.
With the innocent charm of a child, she gently resists the not-so-shy prodding of thousands of men who offer to pay Sweetie for webcam sex. You can see this sprite in action. You’ll need to offer your credit card in payment for more than a quick introduction – that’s how the cybersex game is played.
Sweetie might demur then perform with a convincing desire to please. During her act, identity data is offered by the creeps who jack off on the other side of a screen…many on the other side of the world.
1,000 pedophiles were identified during Sweetie’s first two and a half months of work. (254 are living in the U.S.)
Sweetie always delivers and never seems to get tired. She is a life-like animation developed as part of a 24/7 sting operation by the Dutch chapter of Terre des Hommes International Federation, a charity that supports and protects children.
Terre des Hommes is asking for your signature on a petition to spur law enforcement in various countries to take the information collected about 999 men and 1 woman, and to develop their own cases to arrest and prosecute the international criminals.
You might also want to make a donation to the organization that brought Sweetie to life. That would be a generous way to help continue their work. We assume the organization keeps all the funds which are paid by Sweetie’s customers – now that she is in the news, that source of income may dry up.
The juices that lubricate the child cybersex tourist industry are flowing faster than ever. 20,000 Sweetie patrons will tell you it’s easy to take the movies playing in a sick mind and them into real child abuse with a small anonymous click on the “pay now” button.
The price of such pleasure just got higher for some addicts. Good work, Sweetie.
Yeah, yeah, we know. You didn’t expect Vagilantes to fight against castrating pedophiles. We take a firm, upright position: leave the dicks where they are.
Oh, we also know that pedophiles are not actually risking their dicks…it’s their balls, or some tubing, that people want to wave around as trophies.
Rep. Steve Hurst, an Alabama state legislator, is going for the gold – make that the family jewels. He’s announced plans to reintroduce an ol’ solution to child sexual abuse in the 2014 session. The proposal will legalize castration of convicted sex offenders over the age of 21 who assaults a child under the age of 12.
It’s too little, too late.
On our side of the fence is a vocal group of people who lobby for reproductive rights…the rights of a child rapist to reproduce if and when they want. Throughout US history, the issue of castration has coupled some strange bedfellows. (Ick! I like your vote, but don’t touch me.)
Vagilantes don’t agree that we should worry about protecting pedophiles’ sperm when they may have scarred a child, physically or emotionally, so that they will never have a family of their own.
There’s a solid reason Vagilantes don’t believe castration is worth the effort. We know it’s not the dick that does the deed.
A child rapist doesn’t need a hard dick to ruin a life. Physically and chemically castrated men in nine other states are still able to sexually abuse kids. The threat of castration has not been a deterrent to crime.
We’re glad that Alabama will be talking about how to stop pedophiles, thanks to Rep. Hurst. They need to look for a contemporary answer to the serious problem of CSA. We hope they move their attention from the crotch, and get to the HEART of the problem.
Ah, great idea…cut out their hearts!
Do you have a better solution?
Success is overwhelming the system. Every day, hundreds of online kiddie porn creators and collectors are discovered and reported to the police. Many are arrested. Others are targeted for arrest. The police are building their files and waiting for a time when the crime trail expands to include more pedophiles in the net of justice.
It’s becoming easier to document and prosecute CSA crimes. So easy, that success has buried the courts in a backload of cases which is likely to never clear.
This means that too many child sexual abusers have and will continue to escape punishment. They will escape treatment requirements and sexual offender registration which notifies the public to keep a close eye on these guys.
Britain is not a big country. They don’t have a massive population. They don’t claim to have more than their share of pedophiles. They do have a sophisticated investigation and judicial system. They are not sluggards.
Yet with British advantages, Carr’s numbers don’t lie. If it is projected to take 20 years to systematically address today’s British child porn sickos, then we’re already out of time for justice systems worldwide to solve CSA problems.
Justice systems should be the last solution to social nightmares.
It’s great to catch criminals – it’s better to prevent child sexual abuse. Prevention is the goal.
Prevention education for children can provide a kid with a few tools of defense. It certainly promises they can trust someone will listen when they try to report a pedophile has pulled out his bag of tricks. (Do we always keep this promise?) But, considering cultural resistance to sex education, we’re not empowering our kids quickly enough.
Don’t depend on vigilante justice to swat the creeps scuttling back into their hidey-holes.
We need better answers. We need pretreatment programs that correct the various power-grabbing urges, motivations and perversions of pedophiles.
Vagilantes is on the hunt! Answers can come from anywhere. We’re compiling info about justice system referral programs. That’s not enough. We’re seriously looking for pre-justice system programs and suggestions.
How can we help pedophiles to change themselves? Do you have ideas? Who do you know that has an answer?
Are you, –were you – a pedophile who has found something that turned you around? Please leave a comment or contact Vagilantes with a private message.
It’s tempting to acquiesce and throw up our hands in frustration. Instead, let’s find and create answers.
Damn! It’s been a hard, but usual, week reading the news about hundreds child sexual abusers and their equally guilty cousins, the kiddie porn collectors. Most of these guys arrogantly shake off the justice system and find a way to molest more children.
They are not easy to stop.
Dr. James Kincaid, the author of Child Loving and other controversial books, is scheduled as a keynote speaker at the Bodies At Play Symposium in Canada on October 19. He claims he won’t be silenced with a petition signed by thousands of clear minded citizens who say they don’t want him to instruct pedophiles on how to groom and rape their children.
The Catholic empire continues to avoid CSA confession with little side-stepping moves. This week, the Polish Catholic Church can’t get their talking points aligned. Archbishop Jozef Milchalik blames divorced parents for CSA in the church. Poland’s Archbishop Wojciech Polak sort of apologizes for pedophile priests while Rev. Jozef Kloch, a spokesman for Poland’s Catholic Church, says the church won’t pay financial compensation to proven victims.
Have you seen Michael Sean Stanley? This high-risk, violent, child sexual offender jumped probation and crossed the Canadian/US border, but he was not arrested because of the current USA government shut down and because of other squiggly laws. (Oct. 23, 2013 update: Stanley is back in police custody w/investigation of attempted sexual assault on a teenage boy.)
This not-yet-fully-told story is still a tangled mess. Police report a murder and suicide pact between four kiddie porn creators who ended their lives with shotgun-blasted brains and we’re-not-guilty notes left behind. It appears these people stopped themselves, but who are the other players in this game?
Let’s take a deep breath, then focus on one more case:
Set your sites on an Algonquil, Illinois man, Derrick I. Hill, who walked free this week in spite of court testimony by a relative who was 11 years-old when she reported he came to her bed several times each week and stroked her chest, butt and vagina. She testified he had done this for as long as she could remember.
In a slippery, every-word-counts justice system, guilty people can slide through. What went wrong here? The news reports, indicate Hill was charged with the wrong LEVEL of crime. It seems the jury, following instructions, were forced to return a not-guilty verdict. (We wonder if they are having peaceful sleep this week.)
By the time the wheels of justice turned to a court date, this young girl had probably been through several interviews by various justice system professionals on both sides of the case. Kids generally say less than they know about sex abuse because they don’t have a mature language to communicate what has happened to them. Professionals who interview child witnesses are very careful not to ask leading questions or provide information that might taint a criminal case.
Maybe she wasn’t a great witness when she bravely testified in court. Maybe… something else went wrong.
There’s more to every story, and something isn’t right with this one. In the case of Derrick against the kid, apparently stroking her chest, butt and vagina several times a week, for as long as she could remember, wasn’t enough of an assault to justify the charges he faced.
This girl is off the hook for Hill’s attention. He’ll never touch her again, but his obsession will shift to another child.
Who will stop him next time? Who will stop him before a next time he touches another child?
Vagilantes are welcome to join us at target practice. We need to let off some steam.
We all want to love and honor our elders, but it’s impossible when they shatter our trust and traditional respect.
Grandpa Hill ripped his family apart when he stuck his hands into his granddaughter’s pajamas while she was sleeping. The first time this happened, this ten year old girl didn’t have a context for what was happening. She thought perhaps she was dreaming. The next night, when grandpa returned to her bed for another thrill, she knew she was awake and that something was terribly wrong.
The next morning she told her mother about the weird visit. Mom told dad, and dad confronted his father. Grandpa admitted the assault. The parents responded perfectly when they believed their daughter and immediately left grandpa’s home.
Over the next few days, the family rode the storm of their discovery. Like all families who face such trauma, they had the choice to keep a family secret. The pressure from other members of the family spoke to the character of each one of them.
Led by the dad, who had “lost” the father he thought he had known, the smaller family unit made a brave decision. They filed a police report. The pedophile patriarch was arrested and convicted.
Then mom, dad and daughter, with the support of Voice Today took a huge step of going public about their experience. You can watch their extraordinary interview with Christi Paul on Raising America with Kyra Phillips. It’s heart-tugging. It’s powerful. It’s hopeful. It’s truthful.
Their bravery will change lives in ways they could never have imagined. When someone steps away from the standard of family-first to do the right thing, it makes it so much easier for others to face poison in their own blood lines.
The Hill family is clearly saddened by broken family ties, but they have built a stronger connection for generations to come.
With much gratitude and admiration, Vagilantes recognize these parents for their leadership and for making the hardest decision. That’s real love.